Any information given to the coaches leading to the apprehension and execution of the two cows will be rewarded accordingly. If anyone "delivers" the cows to us for said execution the value of the reward will be substantial. An even higher reward will be paid for the "dead" delivery of the two cows. Otherwise a public execution shall be held so all who have had it with the cows will be able to rest comfortably knowing the cows are gone. The cos have been convicted of the crimes of intellectual property theft, illegally immigrating into the United States,possession and use of biological weapons(hoof and mouth disease), using educational facilities to promote organized religion in a school environment, violations of numerous federal tax laws as their religion is not registered as a legitimate 501c(3) organization, defamation of character of debate coaches, diminishing Des Moines Public Schools educational environment, and transforming four freshmen girls back into 5th graders.
Remember....there are incentives in place by the Maddened Cow Society for the bringing of the cows to justice for parents, students, debaters and teachers.
